Topher Grace Edits The Star Wars Prequels Into One 85 Minute Film









We’ll never see it – but he did it. Here’s slashfilm’s Peter Scittera’s rather longwinded explanation of what Topher has done:

The opening crawl establishes that assassins have been after the queen and Jedis have been sent to intervene.  Topher’s version begins with Episode I’s climactic lightsaber fight between Darth Maul (Ray Park), Qui-Gon Jinn (Liam Neeson), and Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor), bypassing the majority of Phantom Menace completely. Starting the story in the middle of this fight was a brilliant choice. Qui-Gon’s dying request that Obi-Wan train Anakin perfectly sets up the story.

Grace’s version of the film(s) centers on Anakin’s training and friendship with Obi-Wan, and his relationship with Queen Amidala (Natalie Portman). Gone are Trade Federation blockades, the Gungan city, the whole Padmé handmaiden storyline, the explanation of midichlorians, the galactic senate and the boring politics, Anakin’s origins (a backstory which never really needed to be seen in the first place), the droid army’s attack on Naboo, and Jar Jar Binks (Ahmed Best) appears only briefly for only one line of dialogue, used as a set-up to introduce us to the Queen.

The first time we see Anakin, he is grown up and played by Hayden Christensen (Jake Lloyd never appears in this version). Kenobi and Skywalker are assigned to protect Amidala from additional assassination attempts. This leads us quickly into the chase to capture the assassin in the skies of Coruscant. Anakin is assigned to accompany Padmé to her home planet of Naboo. Unlike George’s version, Obi-Wan doesn’t discover an army of clone troopers on Kamino, but instead stumbles upon Count Dooku’s motives.

While the Clone troopers make a couple short appearances in this version of the film, the word “clone” is only used once, and the whole storyline is almost completely cut from the story. Jango Fett makes only a small appearance, and his son Boba Fett is left on the cutting room floor. Anakin returns to Tatooine and finds his mother tortured to death by the Tusken Raiders, but gone is the laughable aftermath.

Padmé and Anakin’s love story is given more of a central spotlight, incorporating a deleted scene of a dinner with her family on Naboo. While the dialogue still sucks, and the romantic scenes are still a bit cheesy, I was left caring way more about this relationship than I was in the original prequels. The arena scene is still included, but shortened.

And just like that, we’re already into episode 3. In this section, Topher has removed General Grievous.

Padme tells Anakin that she’s pregnant.  The Jedi Council orders Anakin to secretly monitor Palpatine and denies him the rank of Jedi Master. Anakin is frustrated with the Jedi and gets closer to Palpatine. He tells Anakin that the Dark Side of the force has the ability to prevent death. Anakin reports him to the Jedi Council, who doesn’t trust him to come along for the arrest. Palpatine/Sidious battles Jedi Master Mace Windu (Samuel L Jackson), Anakin shows up and turns on his old master to become an apprentice to Darth Sidious. Sidious issues Order 66 across the galaxy, and almost all the Jedi are killed.

Obi-Wan informs Padmé that Anakin has joined the dark side. She travels to Mustafar to confront him, and realizes that Obi-Wan was telling the truth. Obi-Wan was able to hide aboard her ship, but Anakin believes that she brought him there to kill him. Anakin and Obi-Wan have their lightsaber battle in the middle of a lava flow, ending with Vader diced and burnt. Yoda and the Emperor have their lightsaber duel. Sidious finds Vader in time to save him, and Padmé gives birth to twins — but not intercut.

The twins find their respective homes, Yoda goes into exile on Dagobah, the droids’ memories are erased, and the film ends with Anakin being turned into Darth Vader. The last shot features Vader’s helmet being lowered down onto Anakin, creating the most iconic villain. And we are left on that dark note.

Yoda doesn’t teach Obi-Wan how to return from the netherworld to see Qui-Gon, and we don’t see Darth Vader learn of Padmé’s death — which also means we don’t see the resulting infamous laughable temper tantrum “Nooooooooooooooooo!!!!”

ALL THAT IN 85 minutes (took me that long to read it!) You can find the full article here: